Seriously it’s been a few months since i last posted that long depressing essay. I can honestly say that i have been a million times better. The long descriptive vocabulary that i had used were all dawned from the creative essence that is a depressed mind. but now i can say that im just dumbfounded. lol. im absolutely retardedly happy. Since that essay, ive learned to overcome depression using the wonderful drugs perscribed to me by my psychiatrist. Its called citalopramand it has stabilized my mood and mind for the better. i have succeeded in school, work, life, and love. lol did i say love? yes i did. The highlight of my year was falling in love with the most amazing girl in the world. The other night i wrote her drunklove essay that surprised even myself. i had no clue i had this strong of feelings for her. this was all done on twitter all in seperate posts because twitter has a 140 character limit!! i’ll post it right here:
I hate saying it but truth is I’ve fallen deep into it and I can do nothing at all but think about it.
It lingers and doesn’t leave.
And the thing is I never wanted it to leave in the first place.
It’s not fair. I hate it but love it so much at once. I’ve not felt this
For a long time. As familiar as it seems, it feels so brand new.
I’ve no clue why I feel this way but it feels so good.
The words that I type continuously…
Are all coming not from my mind,
but the engine that pumps the blood keeping me alive.
My heart is in your hands and I feel so alive.
Inspiration and complete bliss.
Its doing what it has to but only because it’s in your hands.
Many difficulties lie ahead and they are inevitable.
But it’s the one fact that is planted deep into the writing that is my life.
Written and in big bold letters.
Obvious in daylight.
And easy for anyone to see.
Something about the way you are Alice…
Has absolutely captured me.
And I will not escape it.
I will not deny it.
And I’ve already learned to love it.
All this admiration…
Every bit of Inspiration…
Has brought to attention that I, Josh the freaking puffpuff, has failed.
Has failed to stay standing over the deep dug hole that is love.
It’s easy to say I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.
I Love you.
… Wasnt that just lovely? i showed it to myu sister and her girlfriend and they both said it was amazing. But yeah… ive fallen in love with her and i wish i had done it sooner. I guess you can say our story is cliche but in the end it’s all a wonderful wonderful time. Oh the best part is… she’s like the greatest concert pianist evarrr. I swear her fingers are like muthafuckin lightning yo!!! pew pew pew. She blew the audience away playing 1st piano @disney concert hall. Jesus i was all like, “yo thats ma babeh oer durr” lol. i sound like a 12 year old school girl who just had her first kiss. Its lovely. Thats all there is to say. My future. My life is all back to normal. i love it.